Home for the Holidays: A Family Visit Survival Guide

As we endure the holiday season this year, the most socially inept of us dread the inevitable horrors that come with visiting the family during break. Some of us just are not inclined to short bursts of overly affectionate social interaction after a long year of managing to avoid it. We love our families, but it can be difficult to face so much contact in just one day. I’ve created a short list of rules to make the family holiday so much easier.

1) Hack your way out of hugs

When your grandma comes at you with one of her lung-destroying hugs, only one thing may deter her from trying to occupy the same exact space as you: the cough. Break out into the most obnoxious coughing fit you’ve ever had and follow it with a “Oh, I’m sorry I’ve recently come down with [insert minor disease here]. Come here.” All relatives will subsequently back away.

2) AVOID POLITICS

Chances are your older relatives are not going to agree with your political views, and they do not want to hear about it. Nor do you want to hear about theirs. Family gatherings are meant to be a happy occasion, and it is difficult to remain happy when a particularly loud uncle is contradicting your morals. The best tactic when it comes to these topics is smoothly transitioning into another subject before your family realizes what happened.

3) Camouflage

This tip is for those with the most overbearing family members. When all else fails, use your surroundings. Wear a color that makes you unnoticeable, like beige or gray, or just simply let yourself get busy with something they may not want to interrupt, like helping with the preparation of the food, also known as hiding in the kitchen. After all, they can’t speak to you if they can’t see you.

Hopefully these pieces of advice will make the holidays slightly more bearable. Good luck, and happy holidays to all.